she should have expected it; should have known that since becoming the slayer, the universe didn’t allow buffy to know the meaning of happy birthday. the entire night had gone off without a hitch, save for dawn’s temper tantrum that sent her bolting to her room before the cake was cut. other than distractions of the riley variety – the hole that was left in her heart after he left without warning – she had actually enjoyed herself. she was spending time with the people she loved, and the people who loved her back with equal measure. for the first time in a long time, she wasn’t plagued with worries about dawn, or the key, or glory; she was just being buffy, something she wasn’t allowed to be very often.
she should’ve known it was only a matter of time until she came crashing back to reality. the first thing she noticed was the blood, the waves of crimson spilling from dawn’s porcelain flesh. for a moment, she was still, lips parted and breathing paused. what was happening?why was this happening? when she finally finds the strength to move, she surpasses her friends and makes a beeline straight for dawn. hands grasp at her shoulders, grip firm and possibly too tight. in this moment, she wasn’t the slayer – this wasn’t a situation that called for the chosen one. in this moment, she was an older sister, one concerned about the well being and safety of the little girl before her. brows furrowed and lips tugged into a pout, slender digits move to lift dawn’s chin, encouraging dawn to look into her emerald hues.
❛ dawn, what did you do to yourself?❜
“It doesn’t matter, does it?”
The words spill out vacantly, paired with hollow eyes and downturned lips. The steady drip, drip, drip of blood falls to the hardwood floor in perfect time with shallow, uneven breaths as she struggles against the Slayer’s hold, refusing to meet her gaze even when her entire head is forced upward.
“I mean, it’s not like it counts, right? Because I’m not really your sister. I’m not Dawn.“
She couldn’t be. Because Dawn Summers was the five-year-old who fell and scraped her knee, crying and screaming until her mother patched it up and sister kissed it better. Dawn Summers was the nine-year-old who fell off the swing and broke her arm when her sister pushed too hard, but also let her sign the cast first. Dawn Summers was the twelve-year-old who cried after the first time she kissed a boy and didn’t understand why, but still couldn’t help but smile when she finally told her sister every last detail about it.
But none of them were real. She knew that now. So how could she be?
Both Willow and Tara knew that Dawn hadn’t been sleeping well. It hadn’t been hard to guess, considering what they’d all been through in the past months. Losing Buffy hadn’t just been losing a friend to all of them, it had been losing someone they all considered family. In Willow’s case, she’d lost a best friend, and that in itself didn’t make for easy sleeping. Already, she’d been awakened in the middle of the night to nightmares of that scene at the tower, and even Tara’s reassuring words and actions couldn’t spare her from the same nightmares night after night. And it was in that same sense that she related to how she almost knew the teenager felt.
“Me neither…” She admitted, sighing a little as she wrapped an arm around Dawn. Tara had been working late with Anya for the past few nights, leaving Willow with only her thoughts to keep her company at night. Needless to say, it wasn’t an inviting prospect.
Dawn was quick to roll onto her side as soon as she felt Willow’s arm around her, burying her head against the redhead’s shoulder and snuggling into her embrace. It wasn’t the same as Buffy - Willow was taller, softer, more soft cotton pajamas and less hardness around the edges– - but the mere presence of another person was more than enough to let all thoughts of that fateful night and her sister, always looming at the outskirts of her subconscious like a dark storm cloud, to finally dissipate. For now, anyway.
“You put pickles… bananas… and mint frosting… on a pizza?”
“Hey, don’t judge it if you haven’t even tried it!”
Her retort is maybe just a tad too defensive as she glares at him, cradling her half-eaten slice close as if he’d try to take it away if she let go for even a second.
“We try. What do you expect Dawn? As long as there’s something trying to end the world things will be busy. I wish I had more time for you, I really do. But between work, Scoobie things, and Anya I have my hands full.”
“I don’t know,something? Because it’s not fair– - you guys always have time for each other, but never me! And I had Mom but now she’s gone, Xander, and sometimes I feel more alone in my own house than anywhere else!”
boy, did that idea backfire. her features contort into a look of disdain, nose scrunched and eyebrows furrowed. the whole ‘made her from buffy’ thing was always a little strange when she thought about it, but dawn just took the wiggins to whole different level.
❛ okay, enough logic from the one year old. stuff your face with pizza.❜
Her grin only widens as she spots the look on her sister’s face. Mission accomplished! Dawn’s (almost too) triumphant as she takes the first bite of her pizza - because no matter what Buffy says now, she’s totally won this round.
“No.You can’t be sorry. You’re always sorry, but that doesn’t FIX anything!”
Her expression was still molded into one of disgust as she watched the woman she had once considered a sister (but now couldn’t even bear to look in the eye) turn away. She didn’t care what Willow had to say for herself, what sort of defense she’d thought out for herself– - she had lost the right to do that after she nearly got Dawn killed!
There was no excuse for what Willow had done. Not now, not ever.
“One way to stay on top of the game, though it’s nothing like chess or Monopoly.”
“Well, maybe it is a bit like those - since this town sure has the whole ‘us vs. them’ mentality down perfectly. Plus, monopoly can get pretty brutal if you play with Anya.“
