BUFFY:

      she should have expected it; should have known that since becoming  the
        slayer, the universe didn’t allow buffy to know the meaning of happy birthday.  the
        entire night had gone off without a hitch, save for dawn’s temper tantrum  that  sent
        her bolting to her room before the cake was cut. other than distractions of the  riley
        variety – the hole that was left in her heart after he left without warning –   she had
        actually enjoyed herself. she was spending time with the people  she   loved,   and
        the people who loved her back with equal measure. for the first time in a long time,
        she wasn’t plagued with worries about dawn, or the key, or glory;        she was just
        being     buffy,   something     she     wasn’t      allowed     to    be    very      often.

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        she should’ve known it was only a matter of time until she came  crashing  back  to
        reality. the first thing she noticed was the blood, the waves of crimson spilling from
        dawn’s porcelain flesh. for a moment, she was still,   lips    parted    and   breathing 
        paused. what was happening?
why was this happening? when she finally finds the
        strength to move, she surpasses her friends and makes a beeline straight for dawn.
        hands grasp at her shoulders, grip firm and possibly too tight.   in this moment, she
        wasn’t the slayer – this wasn’t a situation that called for the  chosen   one.   in   this
        moment, she was an older sister, one concerned about the well being and safety of
        the little girl before her. brows furrowed and lips tugged into a pout,   slender   digits
        move to lift dawn’s chin,   encouraging   dawn   to   look   into    her   emerald   hues.

                                         dawn, what did you do to yourself? 

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             “It doesn’t matter, does it?”  

The words spill out vacantly,   paired with hollow eyes and downturned lips.
The steady   drip,  drip,  drip   of blood falls to the hardwood floor in perfect
time with shallow,  uneven  breaths  as  she  struggles  against  the Slayer’s
hold, refusing to meet her gaze even when her entire head is forced upward.

            “I mean, it’s not like it counts, right? Because
              I’m not really your sister. 
I’m  not  Dawn.

She couldn’t be. Because Dawn Summers was the five-year-old who fell and
scraped her knee,  crying and screaming  until her mother patched it up and
sister kissed it better.   Dawn Summers was the nine-year-old who fell off the
swing and broke her arm when her sister pushed too hard,  but  also  let  her
sign the cast first.  Dawn Summers was the  twelve-year-old  who cried after
the first time she kissed a boy and  didn’t  understand  why, but still couldn’t
help but smile  when  she  finally  told  her  sister  every  last  detail  about  it.

But none of them were real. She knew that now. So how could she be?

                                 “What am I, Buffy? Am I real? Am I anything?